Leap Day 2004

Ahhhh...the memories...the email invite to Leap Day 2004....

Can anyone turn down an invitation like this?

It's only been a couple weeks, but I've bet you've already spent hours mulling over your 2004 calendar. Staring blankly at starry June, wondering if it can ever live up to the picture of the windmill opposite it. Spending the night with chilly October, wondering if it's too early to start thinking about a costume. In all this time though, did you notice that there was an extra day this year? AN EXTRA DAY!

I know, I know, you're thinking, "Yeah, an extra day I have to work, damn it! And my pay isn't pro-rated to reflect this!" Well, your rent isn't pro-rated either, so quit complaining. You've been blessed with an extra day, so you better do something special with it...like waste it!

So Mark and I have been out here in sunny Santa Monica for over a month now, and the time has come for us to throw The Party to Kick-Start the Big One. Yep, that's right, we're giving you our 100% earthquake guarantee. And not just any earthquake, we're talking about the one that leads to California's inevitable collapse into the ocean. With our close proximity, 20 blocks, to the beach, I'm going to recommend a swimsuit.

The party will be Chicago Style, that is, deep dish, with a poppy-seed bun, pickle spear, sliced tomatoes, relish, onions, mustard, celery salt, and optional hot peppers. We will also be simulating bad Chicago weather. LA scenesters need not apply. Plan accordingly.

Some parties are bound to be full of surprises.

The party will begin on Saturday, February 28th, and will carry on well into the void of Sunday, February 29th, the day that time forgot. It will take place at our wonderful Apartment at ______________________________. You can view video footage of our place at http://mail.thwack.net/~dpuckett It requires Quicktime (http://www.apple.com/quicktime).

It's pretty hot.

I know a lot of you are thinking, "Dude, you're like 2000 miles away, why are you telling me this? You know I can't make it out there." Is that the great American attitude our forefathers had when they built the Petronas Towers, or the Three Gorges Dam, or Mount Everest for crying out loud?! Never say die! Remember the Waterloo! Surely, a good patriot wouldn't let minor details like time or space (or money) get in the way of a good party.

Especially in an election year.

But, hey, if you like being cramped up inside in February, you go do that. Excuse me while I go work on my tan.

If you didn't get a copy of the press release, or read about it in The New York Times or The Washington Post, LA Dustin has been released. LA Dustin comes complete with all the features of Classic Dustin, but now has improved wardrobe (pants!), a cell phone, and a non-paying job!

Get yours today! For questions regarding LA Dustin, and similar products, call ____________.

A lot of people need reasons to do things. I, personally, have never really understood this behavior, but if you've ever needed a reason to go somewhere warm when it is cold where you are, and visiting friends isn't enough, shouldn't a party put you over the top? I mean, it's Leap Day! This happens less than once every four years! (Sadly, very few of us will be able to enjoy the next fourth year that doesn't have a leap day.) What better way is there to celebrate the 366th day of the year than in Santa Monica on the 59th/60th day?

After midnight, anything that happens doesn't count. Think about that, dude. I mean, really think about it. Wicked stuff.

You have plenty of time to take off work, and you might even be able to get cheap Airline tickets. Who knows?! This world isn't my oyster.

We're close to LAX, if you're into that flying thing, and we're right off of I-10 and I-405 if you're into that driving thing. Mark and I will sleep on the floor to make space for you, which is just a small way of showing just how much love we have for you.

We know it'll be a big hassle to get out here for the party. I can assure you, I won't take it personally if you aren't able to make it. Now Mark, on the other hand...So before deciding against this, will you please think of Mark?

Will anyone think of Mark?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Dustin

What else are you going to do?